I'm Veronica¬†ūüôčūüŹĽ


A lively human being, devoted Inner Explorer & Artist -

and Founder of Free-School for Inner Exploration & E-School for Recovering & Expressing the Inner Self.


Traveling, researching and chartering the Inner World is what I do.

The different structures and mechanisms we humans choose is what fascinates

(and sometimes¬†ūüė©ūüė≠ūüėĖūüėĪūüė§) me.¬†Therefore I am constantly observing, researching and

analyzing the different structures and mechanisms of us humans.


To learn, to grow - and to reclaim those lost pieces of our Self.

This is the purpose.


AND to use the researched material to navigate

this earthly experience as a human being BETTER.


 Ascending is the goal.

Not descending.


Now, one of my attributes is, that the uglier it gets in the field of human behaviour,

the more I want to explore and understand why the heck humans have decided to choose shit -

instead of living Heaven on Earth (the normal state of our Inner Being).


Looking at WHY we're not fully alive, is for me one very effective way

to come back to (my) aliveness. And that's what I am doing.


Looking at shit.


There are thousands upon thousands of micro to macro moments

that at some point in our lives, have hindered us to be ourselves.


There were in the past.

There are in the present.

There going to be in the future.


Parents. Family members. Lovers.

Teachers. Neighbors. Friends.

Work colleagues. Bosses. Authorities.

Institutions. Laws. Health.



The list is truly endless.


Yet, one very important chapter that ALL of us have in common are

those first months of us being a New Life in this physical realm.

We all have been a new born Baby.


It begins with the intention of the parents and the environment those two human beings create together.

And it continues with the conception, the birth experience itself and then those crucial first months

where the parents accompany the New Life aka new born Baby into this physical realm.


And oh boy, there are structures and mechanisms

that support Life and others that are hostile to Life.


My entire being thrives for Life PRO structures and mechanisms.

And yet on this physical realm we human beings

have created a ton of Life CONTRA structures and mechanisms.


So. Let's look at those.


In today's Blog Post I share once more my dive into the structures and mechanisms

of a¬†vain couple ūüėĖ¬†and, into the environment both have created together.

Yet this time, the focus is on the New Life that came through them.


¬†You tell me, if the environment this¬†‚Üstnew born Baby currently is in,

is supportive or hostile.




¬ęCold it is.

Unsafe it feels.


Dark it is.

Why am I here?


Cold it is.

Frightened I am.


Dark it is.

Why am I here?


Why is no one hearing me?

Why is no one noticing me?

Why is no one taking care of me?


I am HERE!



Why is no one hearing me?




I'm screaming.

Yet no one hears me.


I'm crying.

Yet no one comforts me.


I'm crying and crying and crying.

Yet nothing changes.


I'm screaming and screaming and screaming.

Yet no one cares.


What is wrong here?

Why am I here?


Why am I here?


This is not what I wanted.

This is not right.


This is not what I wanted.

This is NOT right.


She is holding me, and yet, cold I feel.

She is feeding me, and yet, hungry I feel.

She is changing my diapers, and yet, dirty I feel.


This is not what I wanted.

This is not what it's supposed to be.


This is not what I wanted.

This is NOT what it's supposed to be.


He is holding me, but I do not feel safe with him.

Scared I am.

Horrified I am.


He is playing his instrument,

but his music chaos and horrors it contains.

My ears hurt.

My heart trembles.

My body tightens.


His voice full of untruth.

His noises full of emptiness.

Loud he is.

False he is.

Unsafe he is.

Irritated I am.

Afraid I am.

Horrified I am.


What is going on here?

What is this?


THIS is not what I wanted.

THIS is not what it's supposed to be.


Where is the warmth?

Where is the gentleness?

Where is the comfort?


Where is ALL, that belongs to me?


This darkness so repulsive it feels.

This falsehood so unsafe it feels.


This home is not a home.

This home is NOT a home.


Someone help me!

Someone rescue me!



I don't want this.



Note: Please fill out the fields marked with an asterisk.

As I mentioned in my earlier

Blog Post where I dive into the structures and mechanisms of a vain couple:


One vain person is TRULY yak.

But when two vain people come together,

the gift of Heaven on Earth is replaced by the reality of Hell.

The insanity that IS vanity,

becomes a structural reality.

And if a vain couple "decides" to have a baby and bring it forth...

oh boy.


New Life - is one of the most sacred moment of the Human Being experience.

New Life - is one of the most sacred moment of a couple.

New Life - is one of THE most sacred moments at all.


And yet, that one of a kind sacredness many Human Beings have corrupted.


A New Life - a tool it has become.

A New Life - a power instrument it has become.

A New Life - a compensation for the needy ones. 


It's how we decide to navigate through our own Inner Landscapes

that makes us who we are as Human Beings.


It's not the circumstances we are born into.

It's what WE choose to do with what is given to us.



Do we stiffen and become cold when shit comes up?

Or do we roar our discontent and are a fiery pain in the ass for the environment?


Do we build facades in order to hide what's really going on?

Or do we let see the world our frustration, disappointment and fear?


Do we want the facades and its emptiness?

Or do we want our Truth and its aliveness?


Is it our own unique path that we choose?

Or is it the illusional facade of the crowd that we choose.


The choice is ours.



In this life time as well in the next.

We might as well get our shit straight in this life time, don't you think?



And so the work I do (and offer) is:
1. To look at what really is.

2. To understand its structural mechanisms - and the different pathways and consequences it creates.

3. And to consciously choose a new, different, more Life supportive path for ourselves.




We are all here to learn and grow and expand.

Let this short human experience we have been given,

be an ascending journey and not an descending path.


In the meantime,

with love,





This Blog Post was last updated on Thursday, 08.07.2021.


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